Proud2Bme | My Mother, My Warrior

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My Mother, My Warrior

By Anna Kilar--I vaguely remember the day I was hospitalized because of my eating disorder. It was all such a blur. After visiting my school’s wellness center, the nurse practitioner made the rash decision to send me to the hospital. Before leaving, I picked up the phone and called my mom, telling her I was on my way to the hospital for dehydration and a low heart rate. Fortunately, my mother had been keeping tabs on me from 300 miles away and knew the reality behind my hospitalization. After hanging up the phone, she immediately packed her bags and drove straight to Chicago.

Countless times throughout my recovery, I’ve been called a warrior. But it takes a warrior to guide a loved one through recovery from an eating disorder. Along with my eating disorder came a new person within me. A person who screamed, talked back, and threw food at her mother. The one person who knew me best now struggled to know me just a little bit. She struggled differentiating between Anna and the eating disorder, because the eating disorder was deceitful and malicious.

Every day, she promised me she would fight back harder, stronger than the day before against my eating disorder, if in return I did the same. Over time, there wasn’t a day that went by where she let the eating disorder have its way. She was, is, and will always be a warrior.

Upon returning to school, I found myself bringing my eating disorder along for the ride. Multiple times a day, she would send me encouraging and positive pictures, texts, and emails. She held true to her promise, and because of her, to this day, so do I.

My mother suffered through my eating disorder and early recovery just as much as I did. For 18 years, my mother raised me on the notions that my self-worth is invaluable, I have the ability to seize every opportunity, and that I have the power to love every part of myself. To have all of that squandered by society’s standards and external influences and a nasty eating disorder, she had to start from scratch, removing salt from the wound.

Over the years, my mother has helped me heal, and I wouldn’t be where I am today without that outgoing, beautiful, and strong woman in my life.

And mom, never forget, you’re a warrior. 

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About Us

Proud2Bme is an online community created by and for teens. We cover everything from fashion and beauty to news, culture, and entertainment—all with the goal of promoting positive body image and encouraging healthy attitudes about food and weight.

This site was developed in partnership with Riverduinen and made possible by generous contributions from JPMorgan Chase, Globant, the University of Delaware, and The Hilda & Preston Davis Foundation.

Proud2Bme was first launched in the Netherlands by Riverduinen, a mental health organization that has licensed the concept to the National Eating Disorders Association. Unless otherwise noted, all original content on this site is copyright The National Eating Disorders Association. The Proud2Bme brand, logos, and trademarks are property of Rivierduinen.